Stuff
I am here. Didn’t really feel like writing the past few days because I can’t seem to get any of my thoughts out the way I really want to but I figured trying wouldn’t hurt.
Ever try to see the good from a bad outcome? Niki’s death has brought so many blessings and even though I miss Niki so much it hurts I am happy with the way things have been going since. I have become closer with some people, talked to Niki’s family for the first time and been keeping in touch. It’s been amazing. But it’s still so hard, I teared up during class today, especially when a song comes on that really reminds me of her.
Her aunt emailed me yesterday. I had emailed her first and she sent me the letter Niki wrote me 2 days before she left this Earth and I was bawling. It is the most amazing letter I have ever read and it just gives me so much comfort, and I am so happy she is no longer in any pain. It would be very selfish to want her back just so I would feel better. She went through so much and deserves to be free.
I showed some close people the letter but this is the part that stuck out the most:
“Remember that I’ll be rooting for you all the time dearie , and telling Jesus about you. And I’ll be wanting to tell you about how amazing heaven is but I won’t be able to , so just know that it will be amazing, and know that I will always love you. Look for me when you get to heaven , k? I’ll be waiting for you . ”
How amazing is that. I can’t wait until I see her again, talk to her again, hug her so hard. It will be the best first day of my eternal life. Is it weird to be excited already???
Mollie
That is great. We’re fighting fears and realizations of cancer in our lives lately with family and it’s wonderful to read the letters and words that Niki left you because it makes me realize that this world is not where we should be striving to be happy…or where we should hope others should stay just for our own happiness.
Thanks for sharing. It means a lot.
Posted 2 years, 6 months ago